Laura and Ravel, BFFs.

So it's been quiet which is super nice. I helped Ravel clean his room for his mother, sister, and sister's boyfriend. He rewarded me with pizza from hot box. That's the best kind of reward. I am glad me and him are still friends. I hope someday we can forget this ever happened. Yesterday we talked about it a little still. But a lot of talk was on what we look for in a person and why we think stuff is more important to us personally. We also made fun of each other for wanting to find someone with things. Like how I want someone with bad taste in music like me, who loves halloween to much and likes to drink starbucks all day, who doesn't run through the rain. And he wants a girl who is a loud mouth with long hair and nice tits. Mine, looks like what a woman wants and his is more manly. We also have things like someone who lays around but is quick to think up a plan, someone you can laugh with and understands you and all those good wholesome things you want in a person.
He said he doesn't know if he wants to play the field or look for love and i told him i wanted cheesy dates with nothing serious.
Mainly i am glad that after everything we are still friends. I hope it last past cheesy dates and playing the field. I don't want to end it after we find somebody else, and i am honestly worried it could happen. But we are older and smarter and full of good humor and that does get me hope. Because my last lets just be friends really wasn't any of those things.

His family came over last night and said hi and asked about my foot and how i was feeling and i felt like they didn't hate me. I was scared i wasn't going to be accepted anymore. I know i didn't do anything wrong in our relationship and that temptation and possibles just got the best of Ravel, but he is their baby and i always fear that i will no matter what not be liked anymore. I wish they knew how hard i tried and would still like me. I think they at least like me still and that's honestly what i want more.

I have so much work to catch up on today.
dent my reed
dye my warp
write my artist statement
finish my white sheet project
write my hop paper

tomorrow
i heddle
do one through eight
write my bibliography for weaving.